As I Was Saying
In light of the recent shootings at Northern Illinois University, I refer you to my earlier call for an end to education. Do it for the children.
Guide to Screwing Up
If you’re going to really screw up, here’s how to do it right.
- Ambient Temperature (cold / hot): Cold.
You can always put on more clothing. Common decency and certain legal statutes prohibit the amount of clothing one can remove. - Coffee Strength (strong / weak): Strong.
Simply add water to reduce potency. - Attire (overdressed / underdressed): Overdressed.
It is easier to loosen and untuck than to pass off casual as formal. - Demeanor (reserved / rowdy): Reserved.
Amongst new company it is wiser to be unspoken than outspoken. - Cooking (undercooked / overcooked): Undercooked.
Food can always be cooked a little more. Uncooking, however, is not yet technologically possible.
There are many more items that need to be added to this list but time and lack of imagination prevent me from doing so at this moment.
All the Marx of a True Socialist
But wait, there’s more! In addition to Leftist best-sellers “Impenetrable Bureaucracy” and “Scandals A-plenty,” here are some of the other tremendous titles you can look forward to enjoying as part of “The Hillary Clinton Anthology”:
- “We are going to take things away from you on behalf of the common good.”
- “It’s time for a new beginning, for an end to government of the few, by the few, for the few, and to replace it with shared responsibility for shared prosperity.”
- “We can’t just let business as usual go on, and that means something has to be taken away from some people.”
- “We have to build a political consensus and that requires people to give up a little bit of their own turf in order to create this common ground.”
- “I certainly think the free market has failed.”
- “I think it’s time to send a clear message to what has become the most profitable sector in the entire economy, that they are being watched.”
- “What I want to do is take those profits and apply them to alternative energy.”
Unfortunately, these statements do not come from Karl Marx. They were made by the most probable winner of the upcoming presidential election. As an individual, she is vastly under-qualified and ideologically antithetical to core United States’ principles, but she is not running this race alone. Hillary Clinton holds the reigns of the Democrat Machine. That she is widely regarded as a power-hungry phony has been, thus far, insufficient to stop her seemingly inevitable ascent to power. This machine has been working on her presidential run since before her husband left office almost eight years ago, and in that time she has undergone a tremendous P.R. makeover and amassed an army of powerful allies.
She has the adoration of a sizable voter contingent still loyal to her husband. She has the backing of a small but socially powerful group of Feminists whose sole concern is the President’s gender. As the presumptive Democrat nominee, she has the votes of the politically ignorant who are fed up with Republicans, convinced that Bush has divided the majority of his presidency between spying on Americans and torturing innocent Iraqis. She has virtually unified support from the old media and college professors, and however shrill, she is infinitely more dynamic than either Al Gore or John Kerry both of whom came extremely close to occupying the Oval Office.
Meanwhile, Bush has been decidedly less than Conservative on matters of spending and border control, and has refused to deal shrewdly with the Democrats opting instead to work with them despite their repeated attempts to undermine U.S. national security. Furthermore, absent from the current rabble of Republican candidates is a true Conservative. Few of them appear to be prepared to stand up to Mexico and I’m sick of hearing Giuliani verbally tap dance around the abortion issue by framing murder as a simple matter of states’ rights. We on the Right are longing for a Conservative to step forward and take charge but there appears to be no one to fill this void. Consequently, we are a divided, uninspired lot.
The Left may be united by hatred but they are united nonetheless and unity wins elections. What frightens me most is that Mrs. Clinton’s Marxist rhetoric has been met more by indifference than incredulity. Freedom is power not afforded to the government and it is purchased in blood because governments cede power only in defeat. The blood that purchased American freedom has already been shed, but those who would cast their vote for the likes of Hillary Clinton would have us exchange that freedom for the promises of a ideologically bankrupt politician.